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And Freebird, I am calling you out! If you are half the Ohio State fan you claim to be, you will unearth your Santa visit pic from that mall trip and share it with the world. Mr. I-Got-To-Sit-On-His-Lap-And-You-Didn't! -- jerk.
Turd In The Punchbowl: 1. A comparative phrase that adds a certain repugnance to describe an idea, remark or occurrence that fell flat, killed conversation, was socially unacceptable, or went over like the proverbial lead balloon. 2. Similarly, a gauche, socially inept or unwelcome person who has a stultifying effect on social gatherings, or, by extension, was involved in some futile or hugely unpopular effort.
ASY was established in 2004 and during the next three years received $9.2 million in government funding, according to the audit. Most of that money -- $8.8 million -- was spent on contracts with the Davis firm for public relations activities, the audit said.
Under those contracts, four senior program managers were paid annual salaries ranging from $312,821 to $662,691 in 2007, according to the audit.
Chef's Note: Heat up a lightly oiledfrying pan/skillet. Remove from heat and ejaculate directly into the pan, return to heat and fry the semen without stirring. This will create a mini-omelette, or in some cases, many small omellete-drops. Salt and pepper to taste. This is the perfect introductory recipe for all newbie semen cookers.
I truly appreciate how generous you are with me on holidays, however, in the spirit of true giving and paying it forward, etc., I am asking that people make a donation to one of the charities below in lieu of buying me gifts.Now don't get me wrong, I am no Mother Theresa. I am a typical greedy, sweeping, bloated consumerist American, who makes a good sized asshole footprint on this planet. I just honestly couldn't think of anything I wanted this year.
Of course, if this does not work for you no worries! I don't need to know what you decide. Just an idea.... : )
Happy Holidays,
Daniella
http://womenofhopeproject.org/home/
http://www.hfa.org/about/index.html
http://www.leobuscaglia.org/index.html
http://www.kiva.org/app.php
http://www.operationiraqichildren.org/
"Dude you forgot to hook up the doll" [adapted from Weird Science]- meant that Big V had posted something new during web construction but hadn't refreshed the page so I could see it. Even though the website is done, we still find ways to use this one. It's one of my faves for sure.There are more, but I am blanking. Perhaps the birthday boy himself can add to this list.
"Todd just read the map; I wanna get there!" [adapted from the fab reality show Andrew Dice Clay had last year] - meant one of us was taking too long on a story and/or being tangential, so get to the point already.
"Special skills and Unicorn magic" - is a Dani original I created whenever he would impress me with something techy.
On the 1st of this month, California joined a few other states in banning the use of hand held cell phones while driving. I know many see this as a total legislation victory. I don’t. I feel lumped in and a little civilly violated to tell you the truth.
Here’s the deal: I am not a moron. I’m an excellent driver, (I know – go Rain man* with it – it’s okay) and a multitasker
I can hold my phone and drive. It’s as simple as that. I still watch the road, I still use my turn signals, and I haven’t hit anything. I can go forward, backward, park, and if I had to, I could pull of a brake-stand as well. Actually, I have hit some stuff, but it happened when I WASN’T on the phone. Add that to the study stats people!
So now I am reduced to using speakerphone while driving because I refuse to put all that crap in my ear. It’s not my problem or my fault that others are terrible drivers. I refuse to be punished for something that doesn’t apply to me!
Are we all good break dancers? Are we all great chemists? Are we all going to excel at blowing up bridges? No. Some of us are going to shine and most of us are going to be mediocre to craptacular. That’s just the way it goes. It’s the same with driving. In this country almost all of us are out zooming around on the roads when the reality is that the majority of us are not going to be very good drivers.
So I want a bumper sticker. I want a big M (for multitasker) for the back of my car. This way the police will be able to easily recognize me for the skilled vehicular pilot that I am, and move on to all of the true road menaces.
Until then, I will get behind the wheel, set the celly to speaker, and scream into it like a stereotypical Italian (I'm Italian so no nasty emails about how mean I am), torturing everyone with the accompanying feedback.
It's not my fault. Get me the sticker, and we can all go back to the good ole days when I got to be a big girl and make my own decisions while driving my own damn car! Thank you.
I panic when I burn toast
I repeat myself a lot
Sometimes my brother is a jerk to me
I have brown hair
Remember when they go into the casino dressed alike? My parents did that – dressed me up like my brother when we were little. Good times.
I require a lot of supervision
I like Wheel of Fortune
And…
Of course, I’m an excellent driver! : )