Thursday, December 18, 2008
Little Nut Grabbing, Tree Hugging Bastards!
I hate squirrels.......or rats with a better coat as I like to refer to them. I have never understood a love for these little vermin.
My dad used to name and feed the ones that came through his yard, and all I could ever envision was a back of the neck sneak attack when I went out there. Imagine my dad's horror when he finds me face down with the top of my spine chewed out and a blood smeared squirrel face sneering at him as it ducks behind my head. Not a pretty sight is it?! Well, a time or two I went out there and that scenario seemed imminent as I heard little evil feet scampering over the roof towards me.
I have also been challenged to more than one Mexican Standoff with a squirrel when I was only trying to walk to wherever I was going. Minding my own business, they would just leap out at me and not move. When I displayed my docility by moving aside to let the little hairy aggressor pass, they would jump in my path again, getting all up in my grill!
Anyway, I tell you all of this in a celebratory manner because my dislike and distrust has finally been vindicated!
The Squirrel Defamation League
Suck on that tough nut Squirrel!