Monday, July 13, 2009

Hey Peter, I Can Smell Your Ass From Here



I am dedicating today's post to my cousin Ruth. She was on a flight yesterday that included the distinct nasal experience of having a seat at the back of the plane.

This same letter was sent to me by a friend after I had my own experience of this special kind a few years ago.

Seat 29e -- Airline Bathroom Row

2 comments:

55 said...

OK, that got my attention.

Daniella said...

ha ha -- that's right! Have you ever been told the original joke? It's terrible, but one of Vince's favorites.

I personally narrowly avoided crucifixion myself at about the age of eleven when I thought it would be downright hilarious to tell this joke to my devoutly Catholic father. Good times.

Under "Most Sacriligious Jokes" on Yelp: Jesus is up on the cross and starts to cry out Peter's name.

"Peter! Peter!"

Peter is at the bottom of the hill and upon hearing his name says, "I'm coming, Lord!"

Peter starts to run up the hill and is stopped almost immediately by a Roman soldier.
"I'm sorry, but I can't let you past."

Peter says, "But you must, my lord needs me!"

The soldier replies, "I'll let you pass, but I must cut off your arm."

Peter relents, gets his arm cut off, and continues up the hill, where he runs into another soldier. Again, the soldier won't let Peter pass.

"Peter! Peter!" yells Jesus.

"I need to pass!" cries out Peter.

This soldier makes the same deal as the first soldier, only this time Peter is to lose a leg. Peter agrees, and continues on his way up the hill.

Two more times, Peter is stopped by soldiers on his way up to Jesus, and two more times Peter gives up his remaining limbs.

Dragging himself by his chin, Peter makes it to the foot of Jesus' cross and says, "My Lord! I'm here! What can I do for you?"

Jesus replies, "Peter! I can see your house from here!