Wednesday, February 11, 2009

25 (More) Randumb Things About Me -- The Facebook Version

I cleaned up my craziness a bit so that I don't lose all of my FB friends. Oh wait, no I didn't.....

1. I dated my brother for a while, but it didn't work out. We just wanted different things.

2. I am left handed.

3. I heart books. The way certain authors put words together is just so delicious, and then these little literary tidbits will nestle in my head for years.

4. I was held back in Kindergarten and got many NI's (needs improvement) in cutting and pasting. I still suck at cutting, but I can paste like a Nin-ja!

5. When I see super fat people I almost immediately wonder how much they sweat and how pungent their genital/bum region is as a result of being so well "insulated".

6. My long term goal is to escape to Sicily and live out my Golden Years with a hot houseboy that I sexually harass on a daily basis.

7. I am a college graduate -- beauty college -- yeah, good times.

8. Even though I am an animal lover, I am often completely frustrated by our country's habitual overspending on animals [think Petco, Petsmart, and the ASPCA's $30 mil new facility in San Francisco]. Is all of that really necessary in order for you to take proper care of an animal? Really?

9. I have a crush on Christopher Walken, and would run away with him if he ever came for me.

10. I think tutelage, accoutrement, and turd are completely underused gems of our language.

11. I struggle on a daily basis to not take it all personal.

12. All religious stuff aside, I love Christian iconography...hence the Last Supper in one of my bathrooms and the crosses around my house.

13. In my young adulthood, I was fortunate to have a several people not hold Me against me. They collectively were the best thing that could have happened to me during that time. [insert grateful sigh here.]

14. I still make crank phone calls. Quick shout-out apology to Curtis: Melissa from Mountain Charley's was me, soooo that whole "I missed my period, you better call me!" thing was a false alarm........funny though, right?

15. If I don't pee right before I get into bed, I can't fall asleep.

16. I believe donuts, mayonnaise, lemons, cheese and wine are all ways that a higher power shows love for me.

17. I hate when people tell me that I am loud, because it reminds me that I do not hear well.

18. If I have done something to help someone, or make them smile, then I consider that day a productive one.

19. If I could get in the flux capacitor (sp) and go back in time, I would like to meet Jesus (I want to ask him for some tips on how to wear my hair long, properly and how to be more popular) Beethoven, (Just let me sneak in the back of the hall and hear the last movement of the ninth or the first two of the fifth -- I'm not greedy) my mother (I just think it is thoroughly assy to live inside someone for nine months and then not even really get a chance to get to know them or say thank you.)

20. I love when people remember a story I have told them, and ask me to tell it again.

21. I wish that I felt confident in a career field, so that I would be motivated to pursue it with abandon.

22. I am a total hypochondriac and have diagnosed myself with multiple maladies including, Tourettes, MS, wrist cancer, brain aneurysm (multiple), Schizophrenia, and Rickets.

23. I am easily overwhelmed by the amount of discipline it takes for me not to be an asshole.

24. I named my dog Ruth after my cousin. In hindsight, this decision was one of my earliest adult examples of misguided, slightly distorted acts of love..........but love nonetheless people!

25. I have a horrible habit of etching every little awkward thing I have done into my brain, so that I can relive the moment over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over......

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